A reflection on the past 9 months.
First of all, I just want to thank ALL of you for the support over the past 9 months! I could not have done this journey without each and every one of you. I am sitting here on my birth ball in the wee hours of the morning reflecting on the past 9 months and the journey that it has been. I still cannot believe that Pete and I have been blessed with a sweet little baby and that I have the privilege of growing a human inside of me! This task has been painful, nauseous, emotional and moody, to say the least. But 10,000 times more beautiful and joyful than I could have ever expected. And I continue to reflect on the blessings and prayers that God has answered along the way. I made a list last night on my iphone while I was lying in bed feeling the little one bounce around inside of me and I was brought to tears by God's faithfulness.
I have been blessed with the world's most supportive partner, baby daddy, spouse and best friend
We were blessed with an easy conception!
Our baby has been healthy along the way
We had a successful ECV and the baby is now head down! Whoop Whoop!
I have had almost no anxiety or panic attacks throughout pregnancy
I have slept well throughout the night almost every single night of the past 9 months
I have a team of doctors that I love and trust
Our support group (family, life group, friends, coworkers etc) is absolutely amazing and has blessed us throughout this entire pregnancy with prayers, meals, patience, texts, calls and so much more
And so much more!
I can't help but think back to when we first found out we were pregnant. January 13th, 2019. I remember sitting on the bedroom floor with Pete, staring at the positive pregnancy test just in awe of the fact that a tiny human was inside of me and that somehow it would grow into a child that we would be responsible to raise as our own! While anxiety overwhelmed me, it was quickly overcome by complete peace and joy as I looked at Pete and daydreamed about this new chapter together. One that we had dreamed of and prayed for and talked about for so long!
Then came the pregnancy symptoms.
Some were fun. Like my pregnancy food cravings:
Salty salty salty during the first trimester (a huge change from my normal sweet tooth)
Spicy chips (spicy fritos, doritos, any o’s you can think of and I ate them)
Cold apples without any skin on them (baby daddy was nice enough to peel them for me)
Tuna salad (I woke up one morning during my first trimester before work and legit made a pound of tuna salad with mayonnaise, relish and celery. LAWD JESUS).
BAGELS. I could eat them all day every day (and often did)
NOTHING GREEN DURING THE FIRST TRIMESTER (not today satan)
Cereal (during the second and third trimester I would eat a bowl almost every night before bed)
Cold Cantaloupe (a refreshing healthy craving compared to the normal chaos lol)
CHICKFILA (because #JESUSFOOD)
Nature's bakery blueberry fig bars (I could eat 3 or 4 packs of these a day)
Thankfully the third trimester has leveled out a bit with less cravings. Likely because there is simply no more room for food in there!
Other symptoms were less delightful. Weeks of nausea, vomiting, irritability, mood swings and fatigue! But again, God has been SO SO faithful and has constantly reminded me that this too shall pass and any anxiety I would feel quickly melted away.
Some other fun points throughout the pregnancy:
Thankfully, exercise continued to provide me relief and I was able to run 20 miles per week up until 30 weeks. At 30 weeks, my body made me well aware that it was done running (for now) and I have been able to keep up with daily exercise with the elliptical at the gym and occasional swimming.
We also converted our 5x8 closet in our 1 bedroom 1 bath apartment into a sweet little nursery. One of my absolute favorite things has been filling this nursery with books and tiny baby clothes. Holding and organizing these items make the little baby so much more real to me.
Tons of friends, family members and coworkers blessed baby morgan with the sweetest baby showers and gifts throughout the past 9 months. A special shout out to my sweet bestie bethany for throwing the world's most pinterest worthy baby shower.
A word on baby daddy:
Phew. If only I had all the time in the world, I could write a novel on this. Pete has been THE absolute MVP of this pregnancy. He has put up with a hormonal, psycho woman for the past 9 months. And has done it with grace and patience. He has made me laugh when I needed it, has comforted me through the roughest points and has put on his rally cap when it was needed most.
It continues to amaze me that God blessed me with such a patient, serving, loving spouse. He has gone above and beyond in every single way. And his dreams for our family and our baby are absolutely unreal, adorable and precious and will make a grown man cry. He has been every bit as amazing as I expected and the thought of our baby having Peter as a dad is something that I just cannot put into words. This child has no idea how blessed and lucky they are. The thought of becoming a MOM in a few short days or weeks (come on baby!) is completely overwhelming at times and can leave me feeling completely stressed about the unknown and the path ahead. THEN, these feelings fade away when I am reminded that God gave me Pete as a partner in this journey. I love this man more than words can express and know that watching him as a dad will only deepen this love. This is possibly what I am most excited about throughout this pregnancy.
A word on baby mama:
The nursery is ready, the hospital bag has been packed by the door for a week now. I have read almost every baby book I could get my hands on and have watched countless videos. However, as much as my Type A personality has tried to control this pregnancy, I have been reminded constantly that this is God’s plan and that I am to trust him with it. While some things have been so much harder than I could have imagined, I have consistently felt the holy spirit throughout this journey. I have no idea how this motherhood thing will unfold and which paths will be joyful and which will be difficult (I know I will experience both paths consistently). But I do know that I am meant to be this baby's mom-- that God has chosen me for this little precious baby. My prayer is that I will love him or her more than you can even fathom. That I will be patient, serving, humble and giving as a mom. That I will show him or her what a loving spouse and woman of God looks like. That I will raise this child to be a child of God and to know Him and love him and share his love to others.
My little one, I cannot wait to see your sweet face in a few short weeks. To finally hold your little body in my arms, touch your little hands and feet and smother you with all of the love I have in my body and more.
Phew, now that I am crying over here I want to end this little update with another HUGE thanks to all of you. For the support throughout the past 9 months and the continued support in the future. I (we) could not have done it without each and everyone of you.